I always have to start my story with when i gave my life to Christ because that's really when life began for me. For many years i was on a pretty bad road. I was full of rage, bitter, just tormented inside. I tried everything i could to help myself but nothing worked and i believed i had no hope. I use to just fall on the ground and beg God to kill me. I didnt care how He did it because nothing could hurt worse then the pain i was living in. But, through an amazing set of circumstances, God instead reached His hand down to me and pulled me out of the hell i was living in and through a variety of different people i found out that Jesus Christ loves me and had given His life for me. I love Him for it- how could you not- and Iv been following Him since.
About 2 years after that, i was working in a coffee house and my husband started coming in every day with his bible for coffee. At first i didnt really like him. You see, i was very legalistic when i first became a christian and i thought i knew it all and it was my job to tell you how you should live your life. :) Well, my husband would pretty much tell me i was wrong and either show me the truth in the Word or he'd tell me to go look it up myself which i would do and ofcourse i discovered i was wrong! Needless to say, he wasnt scoring many points with me and some days i would even hide in the back when i saw him coming! Makes me smile now thinking about it. Well, he didnt go away and eventually through our talks and bible studies i came to love him. It was long after that- maybe 8 months- that we got married and we had our reception in that coffee house.
To catch you up to now...we have 4 beautiful boys. All of the were born at home. My husband delivered each one and his strong arms and sweet face were the first things they felt and saw. Isaac is 9, Isaiah is 7, Benjamin is 4, and Simeon is 2. My husband was a general contractor and i have always stayed at home to take care of and home school our boys- something we both saw great value in.
I guess it was around July of this year, my husband started having some diarrhea. You need to understand my husband was the strongest man i have ever known. One time a saw fell down his face and he just got some super glue, went in the bathroom and glued his face back together and went back to work- thats just how he was. So he figured he just had the runs like most guys would think. It went on for about 2 months and got progressively worse. We went to the ER oct 9 and they told him he had a cancerous tumor in his colon and that the cancer had spread to his liver. We immediately turned our faces to the wall ( 2 kings 20: 1-11 ) . There was really nothing the Dr.'s could do and my husband was one who would rather put his trust in the Lord then in men. Like he said to the social worker- I have a heavenly Father who loves me and with a word He created everything we see and until a man can come and tell me he can do that I think im better off in His hands! He was in the hospital for 5 days and then came home, but his pain was not managed so we went back to the er and by just a few days later the cancer had spread to his stomach and lungs. He didnt want to be in the hospital, so we came home still leaving it in the hands of our Father. 2 or 3 days later he woke up and his eyes were pretty yellow and i knew in my heart that there wasnt much time left. So you know, i spent every minute of every day (even while we were in the hospital) by his side just loving on him, kissing him, smelling him, telling him what a great husband and dad he is and how much we love him. November 6 he went home to be with the Lord. He was in my arms and i loved on him and kissed him until there was no breath left in his body. He wasnt perfect, but he was my best friend and my love-we miss him greatly!